Taylor Swift is one of the few people brave enough to admit that a three-month-long situationship will fuck you up more than a six-year-long relationship. It’s girl math but for romance. Ever since Swift announced her latest album, The Tortured Poets Department, at the Grammys in February, Joe Alwyn and his team have likely been bracing themselves for the worst. From the cheating rumors to the “it’s joever” tweets, and that “Tortured Man Club” group chat with Paul Mescal — wasn’t that the whole thing? But now that the album’s out, maybe the armor should’ve been sent to a different address in London. A lot of the songs on Tortured Poets allude to Swift’s relationship with The 1975 frontman and controversy magnet Matty Healy. In December 2022, Healy captioned a photo of himself kissing Phoebe Bridgers with Bo Burnham as “Gay Poets Society.” Is this new album just a mash-up of the two relationships? Or was one muse more productive in the studio than the other? We looked at all the evidence presented to figure out who actually inspired the albums— yes PLURAL, the double-album theory is actually real — and is the most tortured artist.
1. Fortnight (feat. Post Malone)
What do the lyrics say?
All my mornings are Mondays
Stuck in an endless February
I took the miracle move-on-drug
The effects were temporary
Alwyn and Swift potentially split in February 2023, a few months before the official breakup announcement in April 2023.
Who’s it about?
Inconclusive. There’s way too much talk of husbands, wives, and cheating, so it’s probably one of Swift’s fictional-storytelling tracks, with some inspiration from her own heartbreaks.
2. The Tortured Poets Department
What do the lyrics say?
You left your typewriter at my apartment
Straight from the Tortured Poets Department
Matty Healy was seen leaving Swift’s apartment during their romance, so maybe he forgot his typewriter there at some point.
But you’re in self-sabotage mode
Throwing spikes down on the road
But I’ve seen this episode
And still loved the show
They were rumored to have had a “flirtation” during the 1989 era (his words), so he could have pulling the same strings from ten years ago. Especially since he talked about not understanding her fame, ouch.
You smoked then ate seven bars of chocolate
We declared Charlie Puth should be a bigger artist
I scratch your head you fall asleep
Like a tattooed golden retriever
Matty smokes, has tattoos, and probably eats chocolate (he has a song called “Chocolate”). As for whether or not he’s a Charlie Puth stan … Puth did cover the 1975’s “Somebody Else.” They know of each other, at the least.
Sometimes I wonder if you’re going to screw this up with me
But you tell Lucy you’d kill yourself if I ever leave
And I had said that to Jack about you so I felt seen
Everyone we know understands
Why it’s meant to be
’Cause we’re … crazy.
Put a bag of chips on their heads! These two love birds are willing to Romeo and Juliet themselves. If we’re still on the Matty theory, he probably told Lucy Dacus while she was performing with Phoebe Bridgers on the Eras Tour over the summer (Matty played guitar on a few stops including Nashville). Jack is most likely Swift’s favorite producer and best friend forever, Jack Antonoff.
“You’re not Dylan Thomas.
I’m not Patti Smith.
This ain’t the Chelsea Hotel”
Poet Dylan Thomas and singer Patti Smith both lived at the Chelsea Hotel at different times of their lives (Thomas died when Smith was 7.) Thomas is a … tortured poet who died from alcoholism and Smith is a multihyphenate writer who’s dabbled in music, poetry, book-writing, and much more.
Who’s it about?
Congrats, Mr. Healy. The title track is about you. Here, have a cigarette.
3. My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys
What do the lyrics say?
Called the rain to end our days of wild
The sickest army doll
Purchased at the mall
Ok, no one really knows how Swift and Alwyn broke up, just that they did. Some people speculate it was an email from Swift that ended their six-year relationship. However, there’s been no evidence of that in the lyrics. Plus, Alwyn’s feature debut was playing a U.S. army solider in Billy Lynn’s Long Halftime Walk.
Just say when, I’ll play again
He was my best friend
I really don’t think Matty Healy would be considered Swift’s best friend.
Down at the sandlot
I felt more when we played pretend
Than with all the Kens
This might be alluding to the end of her and Alwyn’s relationship during the Midnights era, when they were spotted with a notebook just days before the album’s release.
’Cause he took me out of my box
Stole my tortured heart
Healy was Swift’s rebound post-Alwyn, taking her tortured heart and torturing it even more. That’s what situationships do to you.
Who’s it about?
Seems like it’s mostly Alwyn with a hint of Healy, but we’re giving it to Joe.
4. Down Bad
What do the lyrics say?
I loved your hostile takeovers
Encounters closer and closer
All your indecent exposures
Every time Healy opens his mouth, it must cause some anxiety, from saying something racist about Ice Spice to annoying Lucy Dacus. “Indecent exposures” is probably the nicest way to put it.
Like I lost my twin
Fuck it if I can’t have him
Down bad
Down bad
Waving at the ship
Fuck it if I can’t have him
This might be about Alwyn. Admittedly, they do look alike and this might be a reference to Titanic, when Jack was waving on the ship leaving England for good.
Who’s it about?
It’s a tie, now kiss :-).
5. So Long London
What do the lyrics say?
I saw in my mind fairy lights through the mist
I kept calm and carried the weight of the rift
Pulled him in tighter each time he was drifting away
Speaking of the Brits (and Titanic), the imagery reflects “Dancing with our hands tied,” a Reputation Alwyn-inspired track.
I didn’t opt in to be your odd man out
I founded the club she’s heard great things about
I left all I knew, you left me at the house by the Heath
I stopped CPR, after all it’s no use
Is this a slight diss and/or hint that Alwyn might’ve moved on as well? Heath is also shrubland usually found in Great Britain.
The spirit was gone, we would never come to
And I’m pissed off you let me give you all that youth for free
Swift dated Alwyn for most of her 20s — she should’ve been at the club.
Every day old love affair
Every breath feels like rarest air
When you’re not sure if he wants to be there
Alwyn was neither a fan of talking about Swift publicly, nor attending any of her events (they went to a post MTV Video Music Awards party where he was seen not letting her be bejeweled, a.k.a dragging her into a car).
So how much sad did you think I had,
Did you think I had in me?
How much tragedy?
“Joe and I really love sad songs,” Swift told Zane Lowe in 2020.
I died on the altar waiting for the proof
“Lavender Haze” might’ve just been Swift telling herself she didn’t need to be married but it was what she wanted from Alwyn.
Who’s it about?
Joe, for sure.
6. But Daddy I Love Him
What do the lyrics say?
Sarahs and Hannahs in their Sunday best
Clutching their pearls, sighing, “What a mess”
“I’ve just never been this happy in my life, in all aspects of my life, ever before … It’s not just the tour. I just sort of feel like my life finally feels like it makes sense,” Swift said at her Foxborough show, causing some fancy New England mommies to cringe once they realized who she was talking about.
I’m having his baby,
No, I’m not, but you should see your faces
I’m telling him to floor it through the fences,
No, I’m not coming to my senses
I know he’s crazy, but he’s the one I want
Another Eras Tour Easter egg about Mr. Healy. “This one is about you. You know who you are. I love you,” whispered Swift during “Cardigan,” echoing the same words Healy said at a concert days prior.
Scandal does funny things to pride
But brings lovers closer
We came back when the heat died down
Went to my parents and they came around
All the wine moms are still holding out
But fuck ‘em. It’s over.
Fans wrote an open letter to Swift asking her to break up with Healy, but she held strong and told them to shut up.
Now I’m dancing in my dress in the sun and
Even my daddy just loves him
Eventually, Swift’s parents must’ve accepted the relationship since Papa Swift was hanging with Healy in the booth in Philly.
Who’s it about?
We are batting for Matty.
7. Fresh Out the Slammer
What do the lyrics say?
Fresh out the slammer
I know who my first call will be to …
Healy was her rebound, post-Joe.
Another summer, taking cover
Rolling thunder, he don’t understand me
Splintered back in winter
Silent dinners, bitter
He was with her in dreams
Swift and Alwyn might’ve had a rough winter, especially if she was thinking about Healy.
Camera flashes, welcome bashes
Get the matches, toss the ashes off the ledge
Swift, Healy, and their chaperone Jack Antonoff were spotted at the members-only in New York, Casa Cipriani. Plus, the couple was seen a bunch leaving Electric Lady Studios.
We still wait up in that porchlight gleams
To the one who says I’m the girl of his American dreams
Both Alwyn and Healy are Brits, but most of the song takes place after their breakup so this sounds like Healy’s (rumored) love bombing. Plus, the 1975 has a song called “She’s American,” released a few years after they first met.
And no matter what I’ve done it wouldn’t matter anyway
Ain’t no way I’m gonna screw up now that I know what’s at stake here
At the park where we used to sit on children’s swings
Wearing imaginary rings
But it’s gonna be alright, I did my time
“Children’s swings” might allude to their flirtationship that happened when they were both 25. Their frontal lobes were barely fully developed so they were basically children.
Who’s it about?
Another for the Heal-ster.
8. Florida!!!
What do the lyrics say?
Well me and my ghost, we had a hell of a time
Yes I’m haunted, but I’m feeling just fine
Echoing a similar sentiment to Speak Now’s “Haunted,” Swift is still hanging with ghosts. But this time, she sounds at peace with it — sort of like here breakup with Alwyn.
Florida!!!
Is one hell of a drug
Florida!!!
Can I use you up?
Swift’s first show post-breakup announcement was in Florida, where she changed the setlist from “invisible string” to “the one” during the Folklore set. Burying the nonexistent rope in Florida is a hell of a drug.
Who’s it about?
Swift explained to iHeartRadio that the song was partially inspired by criminals on Dateline who escape to Florida after they’ve committed a crime. And what better place for a brokenhearted person to escape? “I think when you go through a heartbreak there’s a part of you that thinks, I want a new name, I want a new life, I don’t want anyone to know where I’ve been or know me at all, and that was kind of what that was,” she explained. But who was she brokenhearted about? Alwyn, Alwyn, Alwyn.
9. Guilty As Sin?
What do the lyrics say?
This cage was once just fine
Am I allowed to cry?
Swift was content with her privacy with Alwyn for a good long while. I mean, she confided herself to house arrest for almost a year after the KimYe drama. But maybe once she healed, she wanted a more public life again.
Am I bad? Or mad? Or wise?
What if he’s written “mine” on my upper thigh only in my mind?
Emotional cheating, let’s goooo! Swift surprised fans at the 1975’s concert at the O2 Arena in London in early January 2023, when she was presumably still with Alwyn. Is this where the seeds were replanted?
Someone told me
There’s no such thing as bad thoughts,
Only your actions talk
These fatal fantasies
Giving way to labored breath
If you only think about cheating, that’s okay as long as you don’t do it. Right? Right???
Who’s it about?
This track is about Swift feeling bad for fantasizing about Matty while she was with Joe, so they both get shared custody of this track.
10. Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me?
What do the lyrics say?
The scandal was contained,
The bullet had just grazed
At all costs, keep your good name
Swift thinks she got out alive after the Healy backlash.
I want to snarl and show you
just how disturbed this has made me
You wouldn’t last an hour
In the asylum where they raised me
So all you kids can sneak into my house, with all the cobwebs
I’m always drunk on my own tears
Isn’t that what they all said?
Is this about her fans? Or at least the ones who signed that open letter? I, too, would be annoyed if people who couldn’t handle your life for a day started telling you what to do.
Put narcotics into all of my songs
And that’s why you’re still singing along …
Even if they’re hating on her relationship, they’re still streaming and she’s still a billionaire.
Who’s it about?
Her haters, technically. It hints at her Healy romance, but we’ll give it to her critics.
11. I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)
What do the lyrics say?
The smoke cloud billows out his mouth
like a freight train through a small town
The jokes that he told across the bar
Were revolting and far too loud
Healy smokes and jokes, both bad.
They shake their heads
Saying, “God help her” when I
Tell ‘em he’s my man
But your good Lord doesn’t need to
lift a finger, I can fix him
She has no regrets about Healy.
Good boy, that’s right
Come close, I’ll show you heaven
He’s a golden retriever, remember?
Who’s it about?
She wants to fix Healy’s relationship with the public, so he gets this one.
12. LOML
What do the lyrics say?
Who’s gonna stop us from waltzing
Back into rekindled flames
If we know the steps anyway
Okay, this seems like it could be both about guys. Swift and Alwyn reportedly “had rough patches,” this could be about Swift considering going back to him at some point. As for Healy, the rekindled flames could be similar to “Fresh Out the Slammer.”
You and I go from one kiss to gettin married
Still alive killing time at the cemetery,
Never quite buried
In your suit and tie, in the nick of time
Did Healy promise her marriage after a love drought?
You cinephile in black and white
All those plot twists and dynamite
Mr. Steal Your Girl, then make her cry
You said I’m the love of your life
Healy theoretically stole Alwyn’s girl and then broke up with her. Sad!
Who’s it about?
Sounds like Healy was, at one point, the love of her life.
13. I Can Do It With a Broken Heart
What do the lyrics say?
He said he’d love me all his life
But that life was too short
Breaking down I hit the floor
Throughout the beginning of the Eras Tour, Swift was dealing with her breakup from Alwyn.
I’m so obsessed with him, but he avoids me
Like the plague
Again, Alwyn never seemed to want to talk about Swift or attend her events.
I can hold my breath
I’ve been doing it since he left
I keep finding his things in drawers
Crucial evidence I didn’t imagine the whole thing
I’m sure I can pass this test
They lived together for most of the six years — that’s a lot of things to find in drawers.
Who’s it about?
Grab a donut, it’s a cup of Joe.
14. Smallest Man Who Ever Lived
What do the lyrics say?
Gazing at me, starry-eyed
In your Jehovah’s witness suit
Matty wears a Jehovah’s Witness–ass suit onstage, ’nough said.
If rusting my sparkling summer was the goal
And I don’t miss what we had
Healy and Swift dated in the summer, from April to June 2023.
And you’ll confess what you did
And I’ll say “Good riddance”
’Cause it wasn’t sexy once it wasn’t forbidden
Maybe Healy was only interested in Swift because she was in a relationship with Alwyn, so once she was free, the chase was gone.
You crashed my party and your rental car
You said normal girls were “boring”
But you were gone by the morning
You kicked out the stage lights
But you’re still performing
And in plain sight you hid
But you are what you did
Healy was caught examining his car in West Hollywood in July 2023, a month after the breakup. Plus, attempting to rizz someone up by telling them they’re so much better than everyone else is extremely Healy behavior. He’s probably broken a stage light or two.
Who’s it about?
Oh, God. How many of these songs are about Matty?
15. The Alchemy
What do the lyrics say?
So when I touch down
Call the amateurs and
Cut ‘em from the team
Ditch the clowns, get the crown baby
A track about Travis Kelce this early? I’m just as surprised as you are.
’Cause the sign on your heart said it’s still reserved for me
Kelce has always been upfront about his crush with Swift. He told New Heights listeners that he made a bracelet with his phone number on it to give to her.
Hey you, what if I told you we’re cool?
That child’s play back in school
Is forgiven under my rule
Kelce had a rough college experience; his immaturity almost cost him a Super Bowl–winning NFL career. But Swift forgives is forgiving his past behavior because #love.
These blokes warm the benches
Most of her exes in the past decade were from across the pond, reminding Kelce she’s all-American now.
Shirts off, and your friends lift you up over their heads
Beer sticking to the floor
Cheers chanted ’cause they said
There was no chance, trying to be
The greatest in the league
Where’s the trophy?
He just comes running over to me
So happy her Travvy made it to the big game. The Kansas City Chiefs won the Super Bowl, but Swift knows she’s the real prize.
Who’s it about?
Kelce, baby!
16. Clara Bow
What do the lyrics say?
“No one in my small town thought
I’d see the lights of Manhattan
This town is fake but
You’re the real thing
Breath of fresh air through smoke rings
Take the glory give everything
Promise to be dazzling”
Swift reflects on her own career and accomplishments from Pennsylvania to New York, baby.
You look like Taylor Swift in this light, we’re loving it
You’ve got edge she never did
The future’s bright, dazzling
Swift has grown out of comparisons to other artists in her career, she’s in her own league.
Who’s it about?
Herself. Cute!
17. The Black Dog
What do the lyrics say?
I am someone who, until recent events
You shared your secrets with
And your location
You forgot to turn it off
And so I watch as you walk
into some bar called The Black Dog
And pierce new holes in my heart
You forgot to turn it off
The Black Dog, a real bar in London, is famously where Alwyn lives. Maybe Scheana Shay and Swift have something in common, tracking their loved ones like Sims in their Find My Friends app.
When someone plays ‘The Starting Line’
and you jump up,
But she’s too young to know this song
Young-lady burn! The Starting Line shared a record label with Steel Train, one of Jack Antonoff’s bands.
You said I needed a brave man
Then proceeded to play him
Until I believed it too
Alwyn is a capital-A Actor, playing the role of everything Swift wanted.
For a cruel fraternity I pledged
Alwyn and his childhood friends call themselves “the Frosty Crew” — boy, he sure loves club names. Swift credited several photos in the reputation tour book and the Miss Americana documentary with “Frosty Club Photography.” She was probably an honorary member.
Six weeks of breathing clean air
I still miss the smoke
On Lover’s “Daylight,” Swift sings, “Clearin’ the air, I breathed in the smoke,” probably missing Alwyn despite their end.
Who’s it about?
We are so back with an Alwyn track.
18. imgonnagetyouback
What do the lyrics say?
Whether I’m gonna be your wife or
Gonna smash up your bike
Swift might be referencing the 1975’s song “FallingForYou,” not only in the title format but also in the lyrics. “All we need is my bike and your enormous house / You said someday we might / When I’m closer to your height.” This was written one year before Healy and Swift officially met in 2014, but the shoes fit, even if it means Healy is still an inch shorter than Swift.
I’m an Aston Martin that you steered straight into the ditch
then ran and hid
Is this confirmation that Fernando Alonso fumbled the bag?
Say you got somebody I’ll say I got someone too
Another the 1975 reference to the song “Somebody Else”: “I don’t want your body / But I hate to think about you with somebody else”
Who’s it about?
Her love of the 1975 but also Matty Healy.
19. The Albatross
What do the lyrics say?
Cautions issued, he stood
Shooting the messengers
They tried to warn him about her
Whenever Swift is single, people love making the overplayed joke about her writing songs about her exes, but don’t you think they all know this by now?
You couldn’t conceive it
You were sleeping soundly
when they dragged you from your bed
And I tried to warn you about them
Healy probably paid no attention to the backlash until the internet tallied up all the offensive things he’s said and done over the years.
Who’s it about?
Healy scores once again. Sigh.
20. Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus
What do the lyrics say?
Hands in the hair of somebody in darkness named Chloe or Sam or
Sophia or Marcus
Healy famously loves to kiss people, whether it’s one of his fans, crew members, or his friend Phoebe Bridgers.
And you saw my bones out with
somebody new
Who seemed like he would’ve bullied you in school
And you just watched it happen
Healy would’ve 10,000 percent bullied Alwyn in high school. And Kelce would’ve bullied Healy. It’s as if her exes wouldn’t like each other or something.
You said some things that I can’t unabsorb
You turned me into an idea of sorts
You needed me but you needed drugs more
And I couldn’t watch it happen
Swift hinted at some potential love-bombing during her announcement of the album. She also possibly references Healy’s drug addiction in the following two lines.
Who’s it about?
What do shoes with wheels and this song have in common? They’re both Healy’s. More importantly, who is Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus?
21. How Did It End?
What do the lyrics say?
We’ll tell no one except all of our friends
We must know
How did it end?
Okay, if we’re leaning into the belief that Swift and Alwyn broke up in February, but announced in April, then they had a few weeks to tell their friends about it. This timeline tracks.
Soon they’ll go home to their husbands
Smug cause they know they can trust him
Then feverishly calling their cousins
News must’ve spread slowly in Swift and Alwyn’s circles regarding their breakup until it got to Entertainment Tonight weeks later. An adult game of telephone.
Didn’t you hear they called it all off
Did they call off an engagement, wedding, or just a relationship? We may never know.
Who’s it about?
This has Alwyn written all over it.
22. So High School
What do the lyrics say?
I’ll drink what you think and I’m high from smoking your jokes all
damn night
Smells like another Kelce track. Remember all of his resurfaced tweets?
I’m watching American Pie
With you on a Saturday night
Your friends are around, so be quiet
I’m trying to stifle my sighs
Swift has been spending a good amount of time with Kelce’s friends, both on and off the field. And American Pie is probably Kelce’s favorite movie. Release his Criterion Closet video!
Are you gonna marry, kiss, or kill me?
It’s just a game, but really
I’m betting on all three
In 2016, Kelce plays “Kiss, Marry, Kill” with AfterBuzz TV and chooses to smooch Swift. Aw!
You know how to ball
I know Aristotle
Travis = ball boy, Taylor = reader.
You knew what you wanted
And, boy, you got her
Again, Kelce was so unapologetically honest with how he wanted to date Swift, and now he’s got her — possibly for good.
Do that impression you did of your dad again
Hopefully, Ed Kelce’s local library got a shipment in of TTPD, because he just got his first mention. He is a lover of the library after all. “He’s probably saying, ‘I’ve taken all your CDs out at the local library, and I’ve burned them into my computer because that is legal as a tax-paying citizen,’” Jason Kelce joked on an episode ofNew Heights.
Who’s it about?
Kelce scored a Super Bowl win and the cutest song on the album.
23. I Hate It Here
What do the lyrics say?
All you’ll ever be is
My eternal consolation prize
Alwyn loves talking about how he’s such a private guy and in order for Swift to be with him, she had to be as well, making him her prize.
You see I was a debutant in another life but
Now I seem to be scared to go outside
Swift was afraid of leaving the house after the KimYe drama, but now she is staying home for different reasons. Maybe heartbreak?
Who’s it about?
Inconclusive. Yeah, there’s a line here about Alwyn, but it seems more about Swift being depressed about where she was at in her life when writing this song.
24. thanK you aIMee
What do the lyrics say?
And I can’t forgive the way you made me feel
Screamed, ‘fucK you aIMee’ to the night sky
as the blood was gushing
The old Taylor can actually answer the phone because she’s capitalizing letters in her song lyrics again, and this one spelling “Kim,” as in North West’s mom.
Who’s it about?
Kim Kardashian.
25. I Look in People’s Windows
What do the lyrics say?
What are the chances you’d be downtown
Downtown, downtown
Does it feel alright to not know me?
I’m addicted to the ‘if only’
Honestly, this song could be about anyone. Whenever you’re in an ex’s town, it’s hard not to wonder, What if I saw them?
Who’s it about?
Inconclusive; not detailed enough to hit the Matty or Joe bin.
26. The Prophecy
What do the lyrics say?
Please
I’ve been on my knees
Change the prophecy
Don’t want money
Just someone who wants my company
She’s begging for her situationship Matty Healy whereas in most of the Alwyn songs. she seems to accept the breakup.
Who’s it about?
Matty Healy takes one more.
27. Cassandra
What do the lyrics say?
So they killed Cassandra first
Cause she feared the worst
And tried to tell the town
So they filled my cell with snakes
In Greek mythology, Cassandra was cursed to utter true prophecies only for no one to believe her. Swift tried warning people about Kim Kardashian.
Who’s it about?
Herself but also Kim Kardashian.
28. Peter
What do the lyrics say?
You said you were gonna grow up
Then you were gonna come find me
A Peter Pan metaphor never gets old. A man promises to find her once they’re older, and he does but quickly leaves.
Who’s it about?
Matty Healy.
29. The Bolter
What do the lyrics say?
“Oh, we must stop meeting like this”
But it always ends up with a town car speeding
Out the drive one evening
Ended with the slam of a door
Swift loooooves a getaway car, and she and Healy shared plenty.
Who’s it about?
Matthew. Timothy. Healy.
30. Robin
What do the lyrics say?
You got the dragonflies above your bed
You have a favorite spot on the swing set
You have no room in your dreams for regrets
You have no idea
The time will arrive for the cruel and
the mean
You’ll learn to bounce back just like your trampoline
This song has the same vibe as Speak Now’s “Never Grow Up.” Swift is a young muse to continue being imaginative. Robin could allude to Winnie-the-Pooh’s Christopher Robin.
Who’s it about?
This was co-written by Aaron Dessner, so there is a good chance it was written for his son, also named Robin.
31. The Manuscript
What do the lyrics say?
Now and then she re-reads the manuscript
Of the entire torrid affair
Is Swift done with Jake Gyllenhaal? While discussing the All Too Well short film with director Mike Mills at the Tribeca Film Festival, she revealed that she wrote manuscripts for all of her directed projects.
In the age of him she wished she was thirty
And made coffee every morning in a French press
Gyllenhaal and Swift had a notable age gap, as I’m sure you’ve heard.
Who’s it about?
Jake Gyllenhaal — or at least the making of the All Too Well short film.
So, who is The Tortured Poets Department: The Anthology mostly about?
The scores are in: Jake Gyllenhaal, Baby Dessner (Robin), and Taylor Swift’s haters are tied for one song each. For fifth place, songs about Swift herself and Kim Kardashian are both at 1.5 (they share custody on “Cassandra”). Travis Kelce gets two whole songs all to himself. Spot No. 3 goes to … inconclusive. No, really — it’s for songs that are probably not about anyone in particular.
Second place goes to Swift’s longtime boyfriend Joe Alwyn. He earned seven songs, which is kind of insulting considering he had full albums about how much she loved him. And in first place, you all love to hate him; it’s tortured poet Matty Healy coming in with 13 songs inspired by their three-month-long romance. And who says she isn’t relatable?
Related
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Alejandra Gularte , 2024-04-20 01:05:39
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